No Wicked Thing

"He who does not wish the enemy to force 

his way into the fortress must keep the gate closed."

St Francis de Sales

"I will set no wicked thing before my eyes." (Psalm 101:3) 

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." (Philippians 4:8)

The Door of Mercy

'Before I come as a just Judge, I first open wide the door of My mercy.'

Jesus to St. Faustina

How to Open...

'Prayer is the door 

to favors as great as those He has granted me. 

If this door is closed, I don't know how He will grant them.'

St. Teresa of Avila

 

Two Doors Stand Before Me

'Enter through the narrow door.
The door that leads to
damnation is wide,
the road is clear,
and many choose to travel it.
But how narrow is the gate
that leads to life,
how rough the road,
and how few there are
who find it!'  (Matthew 7:13-14)












Painting from original by Vilhelm Hammershoi - digitally altered

Unlock Your Soul

'Let your door stand open to receive Him, unlock your soul to Him, offer Him a welcome in your mind...

Throw wide the gate of your heart, stand before the everlasting Light that shines on every man...  He does not want to force His way in rudely, or compel us to admit him against our will….

Our door is faith; if it is strong enough, the whole house is safe. This is the door by which Christ enters….
It is the soul that has its door, its gates.

Christ comes to this door and knocks;

He knocks at these gates. Open to him; He wants to enter, to find His bride waiting and watching…'

   

St. Ambrose

Painting: Carl Vilhelm Holsoe

The Door of What Must be Done

'On hearing Christ's voice, 

we open the door to receive Him, as it were,

when we freely assent to His promptings 

and when we give ourselves over to doing what must be done.'

St. Bede

Painting: Edmund Tarbell, 1910, in US public domain due to age

Nothing Short of a Celebration

Each time I say a deeper yes to God, I battle thoughts about what to expect. Will a giant cavern suddenly open up beneath my feet? Will I be asked to hike barefoot through burning deserts?

I really should know better by now.

Funny that I seldom consider (when I'm uttering deeper yeses) the truth that God's will is always for my good. This does not mean that difficult circumstances won't pop up from time to time, for of course they shall. But they will do so with or without my yes to God. The truth is: God showers me with blessings. I may not always recognize them as such, but the blessings are abundant. Jesus is with me, and nothing can pull Him from my heart. I possess the very satisfaction that all are seeking and that no one can really find without finding Him. 

I know I say it over and over (no doubt because I need to hear it over and over), but every time I step more deeply toward God, I am met with nothing short of a celebration. Whether or not I can "tell this" from my earthly perspective, it is in fact what is happening. 

I really should know that by now. 

"I know well the plans I have for you, says the Lord; plans for your welfare, not for woe!  Plans to give you a future full of hope.”  (Jeremiah 29:11) 

"Freed from the heavy burden of my own will, I may breathe freely under the light load of love.”  (St. Bernard of Clairvaux)

“The height of loving ecstasy is when our will rests not in its own contentment, but in God’s will.” (St. Francis de Sales) 

“I am the Gate. Whoever enters through Me WILL BE SAFE.” (Jesus, quoted in John 10:9)


Painting: Jules Cyrille Cave, The Flower Girl,1897

Text not in quotes © 2015 Nancy Shuman.  All Rights Reserved.
thecloisteredheart.org   


 

Getting Off the Threshold

Admission: I have tried all day to write this post, and I'm kind of stuck.

Could that be (I wonder) because I, myself, am kind of stuck? We've often said that a person entering physically cloistered life is either in or out. She does not stick her head in and leave her arms and legs dangling outside the enclosure door, perhaps to be brought in at a later date. I find it a helpful image, for I can so easily bring part of my life into the will of God while leaving some of me outside. I might find myself clutching this little worry, that tiny vice, that long held attachment...

Could it be that I've set up camp right on the edge of the doorway? Am I parked on the threshold of living for God - not totally out, but not totally in?

Lent is a perfect time for getting off the fence - or, in this case, getting off the threshold. I'm helped by remembering that, in deciding to live "in God's will," I am not simply stepping away from something. I'm not just saying farewell to complacency and sin and compromise so I can become "a better person." No.

I am moving toward something. Or I should say, toward SomeONE. It is for Him that I step through the door into surrender to His will. And all the steps after - all of those stairs and turns and inner doorways that frighten me now with whispers of "but what if this happens," and "what if you lose that" - I will not have to take those steps alone. I will not be by myself as I live within His will.

As I tell God that I want to say a deeper yes to Him, something happens. Christ is the Bridegroom of the soul - and what traditionally happens when the bride arrives at the threshold?

All I have to do is let Him carry me over it in His arms.

"My Jesus, please accept the offering and the sacrifice that I make to You this day, as I once more sincerely  offer to You my entire will. Tell me what You want me to do. Your holy grace will help me to do it." (St. Alphonsus Liguori) 

Painting: Vilhelm Hammershoi; 
bottom copy digitally altered using a painting by James Tissot




Text not in quotes © 2015 Nancy Shuman. 
thecloisteredheart.org    

Linked to 40 Days of Seeking Him  

Toward Hallways Beyond

'The thing that draws me most about monasticism,' I wrote here recently, 'is its absolute totality.'

I have spent days now considering this statement. Is that what truly does draw me most? 

Yes, it is. Has it drawn me for a long time? Oh, indeed! Do I live such totality? Well

I want to. I genuinely want to. I want to move out of the wide hallway of 'on-the-periphery-of-my-life-religion' into living fully, not just partly, for Christ.

The only doorway into cloister of the heart (we've said many times) is the doorway of surrender to God. But the step across that threshold is not it a one-time-and-it's-done event. I can step now, yes; but there will be new steps to take tomorrow. I know I can't just cross that threshold and sit down. I will be called to follow Christ through doors yet unseen, around unknown turns of hallways beyond.

We are now on the threshold of Lent, and it occurs to me that this is a good time for stepping. So I make a decision to say a deeper yes, to allow God to draw me closer to Him, to take a brand new step. 

I invite you to come with me, this Lent, toward hallways beyond. Let's see what's around the bend.....

'Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it.' Matthew 7:13

Painting: Vilhelm Hammershoi

Linked to 40 Days of Seeking Him








Text not in quotes © 2015 Nancy Shuman.  All Rights Reserved.
thecloisteredheart.org   

And Our Entrance is...

The thing that draws me most about monasticism is its absolute totality.  The person entering such a life gives ALL.

As I've written before, a potential postulant does not stick her head inside the enclosure and leave her arms and legs dangling outside.  It just won't work. She must make a choice.

How often do I look toward the "door of total commitment," feeling drawn toward it, while at the same time holding back? 

I enter cloister of the heart through the doorway of surrender to God. A door of  "yes" is the only way in. 

Yet (in circumstance after circumstance) I find myself vacillating. I want a print-out of all that will be asked of me before I give my consent.  I second-guess, look back, shuffle, struggle, worry, fret.

Then, timidly, I stick one toe toward that door.

…and it’s as if He suddenly, tenderly, picks me up and carries the rest of me inside.  Even those flailing arms and legs.  

"Choose this day whom you will serve."  (Joshua 24:15) 

"Jesus, I give You my whole heart and my whole will.  They once rebelled against You, but now I dedicate them completely to you…Receive me, and make me faithful until death.”  (St. Alphonsus Liguori).

"I am the Gate. Whoever enters through Me WILL BE SAFE.” (Jesus, quoted in John 10:9) 

Painting: Vilhelm Hammershoi 

Text © 2015 Nancy Shuman.
thecloisteredheart.org   

The Way Through the Walls

Of all the 'series' done on this blog, I've probably gotten the most (personally) from the one on 'walls,' done in Lent of 2013.

I would like the opportunity to go through those reflections again, asking God to lead me, to free me of sin, to heal me of distractions and 'what ifs' - and of anything that may have put a wall between me and Him.

In order to go back through this, I am again linking these posts in chronological order.  If you would like to join in re-visiting these, click this line (or the link below) to open the first post. There will be a line at the bottom of that post, linking it to the next one in the sequence.  And on and on. The links are all to posts within this one blog.

In case anyone might like to re-visit any one particular 'wall,' I am also including the list of posts here, individually.  Clicking any line below will take you directly to that post.

I pray that our Lord, Jesus Christ, will open our hearts wide to His love!


The Door in the Wall

Let's Go In

Lord, Free Me of Sin

The Other Side of That Wall

The Wall of What Ifs

The Wall of Distractions

Sometimes We Need a Little Help

With God's Help, I Can Scale Any Wall

Grabbing the Ropes

I Ask You

The Shattered Wall



To begin the entire series on walls, click here


Photo on this post by C Wells 

This post is linked to Catholic Bloggers Network Linkup

Or Come by Some Forgotten Way

'Come with the dawn,
shine in on me,
and wake my soul
with welcome light;
Or let the twilight herald Thee,
and falling dusk, Thy shelter be
to shroud Thy coming
from my sight.

Or come by some forgotten way
untrodden long, and overgrown;
and of a sudden on a day
burst in; snap web and ivy spray
that claim the entrance for their own.

So many doors, and all divine,
and every latch is loose to Thee.
So many paths, and all are Thine
that bring Thee to this heart of mine,
and all are therefore dear to me.'

(from "Listening to the Indwelling Presence," compiled by a Religious, Pellegrini, Australia, 1940, p. 31)

Painting: Pieters In de tuin

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Each Sin Has Its Door

'Each sin has its door of entrance.
Keep-that-door-closed!
Bolt it tight!
Just outside,
the wild beast crouches
in the night.
Pin the bolt with prayer;
God will fix it there.'


(from "Listening to the Indwelling Presence,"
compiled by a Religious, Pellegrini, Australia, 1940, p.191)




Painting:  Théo Van Rysselberghe

click here to leave comments in The Parlor       

One Deciding Step

As has surely become obvious over these last few days, I sometimes imagine myself before a cloister door.  

I have pictured this for years, actually, for the mental image of it helps me see the life to which I am called.  In the analogy of the cloistered heart, the will of God is my enclosure... a reality before which (when faced with its possible implications) I am tempted to draw back, waver, second-guess.

I have no reservations when God's will and mine are precisely the same.  But at some point(s), my will and God's are going to conflict.  I know this; in my heart I know this.  What happens then? 

“Live in My will,” God tells me.  “Live in My will when you understand it and when you do not.  Trust ME."  In the face of such an invitation, I have a choice to make.

I like to remember that a person entering physically cloistered life does not stick her head in today and leave her arms and legs dangling outside.  She is either in or she’s not.  And yet I can give myself mostly to God and leave parts of my life dangling outside that surrender.  

Making the decision to embrace the will of God is not a once-for-all-time-thing, of course.  I re-decide, circumstance by circumstance.  But there is something about at least making my choice of God's will specific.  One deciding step.  I have found that grace comes with making this decision.  I tell God I want to live according to His will… and then in circumstance after circumstance, I find that His grace abounds.

So yes, I imagine myself standing before an enclosure door.  I consider.  I vacillate.  I want a print-out of all that will be asked of me before I give my “yes.”  I’m trembling, halting, looking back, shuffling, straining.  Then, timidly, I stick one toe forward…

…and it’s as if He suddenly, tenderly, picks me up and carries the rest of me inside.  Even those dangling arms and legs.

"Take, Lord, all my liberty.  Receive my memory, my understanding, my entire will.  
Whatever I have and possess, you have given me; to You I restore it wholly,
and to Your will I utterly surrender it for my direction. 
Give me the love of You only, with Your grace,
and I am rich enough; nor do I ask anything besides."  (St.Ignatius Loyola)




"I am the Gate. Whoever enters through Me WILL BE SAFE.” (Jesus, quoted in John 10:9) 

Text © 2014 Nancy Shuman. 
thecloisteredheart.org   

You are invited to leave comments in The Parlor  

 Painting: Edelfelt, At the Door, 1901, in US public domain

An Enclosure Door for Me

Sometimes I feel world-weary.  Tired of putting up, not just with my own failings, but with the shameless acceptance of sin that's dancing proudly all around.  I don't have to look far to find it.  In fact, I don't have to "find" it at all.  It leers from newcasts and taunts from TV screens and celebrates its own rebellion, unashamed.

It seems that evil is marching right out of the shadows, where once it lay hidden.  It boldly kills, lies, cheats, distorts, perverts, abuses, and mocks the holiness of God. 

And, having written that last paragraph, I know why I'm feeling weary.  Evil is mocking God.

It's trying to convince us that God isn't there, He doesn't care, and we can do whatever we want with our bodies and babies and friends and enemies and world.  The world is ours, evil tells us; we are thoroughly in control.

If enough people do/say/believe/practice/ignore a behavior (we're "told"), it must be fine.  Again and again, the love and truth and mercy of God are shunned and rejected.  Can you imagine loving someone so much that you would take a beating for them?  Be nailed to a Cross and die for them?  And then can you imagine having your loved one laugh in your face, spit on you, mock you, say they hate you?  It happens to Jesus every day. 

Wouldn't it be nice, I sometimes think, to walk through an enclosure door and leave the wicked world behind. To go where people live for the Lord Who died for them; where they accept His love and forgiveness, where they recognize sin for what it is, where they return love for Love.

I know it's not that simple; of course it's not.  But it does represent an ideal.  And for those of us not called to such a life, it can (I think) have something to say.

I cannot walk away from the world, nor should I.  I can't flee from the mockery and rebellion.  To walk away from the world would be walking away from my vocation, for "in the world" is where my call lies.  While I can limit a great deal of the garbage that tries to find an entrance into my mind, I can't eliminate all of it.  And that is why I appreciate the analogy of the cloistered heart, and the visual imagery of the grille, and the door through which I am invited to walk.

The doorway for a cloistered heart is the door of total surrender to God. 

As I've written before, sometimes I imagine myself standing before a physical door.  I consider.  I vacillate.   I want a print-out of all that will be asked of me before I give God and His will an unqualified “yes.”  I’m second-guessing, halting, looking back.  Then I stick one foot forward… 

“Jesus, I give You my whole heart and my whole will.  They once rebelled against You, but now I dedicate them completely to you…Receive me, and make me faithful until death.”  (St. Alphonsus Liguori).   

Yes, I am world-weary.  But there's a cloister I can live in; there is grillwork I can look through.  

There is an enclosure door for me.  

William Paxton painting, public domain

Text © 2013 Nancy Shuman.  All Rights Reserved.
thecloisteredheart.org    

He Knocks...

While looking into the "cloistered" heart of St. Ambrose, I came across a post from last year.  I remember how struck I was when I originally put these two paintings together, seeing how they "happened" to line up onscreen.   

As always, today I prayed to be led as to whether or not to present this again.  After all, many saw the post a year ago. 

But you know what?  I had the distinct thought that someone, somewhere, may "need" this now, this very day.  

I wonder if someone, somewhere, just might be hearing a knock.....

   
"Let your door stand open to receive Him, 

unlock your soul to Him, 

offer Him a welcome in your mind...

Throw wide the gate of your heart,
stand before the sun of the everlasting Light 
that shines on every man... 
He does not want to force His way in rudely,

or compel us to admit him against our will….

Our door is faith; if it is strong enough, 
the whole house is safe.
This is the door by which Christ enters….

It is the soul that has its door, its gates. 
Christ comes to this door and knocks;
He knocks at these gates.
Open to him;
He wants to enter,
to find His bride waiting and watching…"

                        - St. Ambrose

Click here to leave comments in the Parlor 

I Ask You

I have grabbed onto the 'ropes,' allowed God to help me through walls that kept me from Him, I've made the climb.  It has taken cooperation on my part, but I can now concentrate better in prayer.

Sometimes, it's as if a door opens and my heart suddenly recognizes the One I've been seeking.

Is what I find worth my efforts? 

I ask you.  

This is part of a 'mini-series' of posts on walls. To continue, click here.

Sometimes We Need a Little Help

There has been a breakthrough in my personal wall of ‘distracted prayer.’  I’ve found a door.  But can I describe it?  We’ll see.  This may not be all that easy, so I beg your patience as I try.

After reading a recent comment, I was hit with it.  I've been feeling as if I'm running from God when I don’t look forward to prayer time.  Not a pleasant thought at all.  I have felt lazy, undisciplined, and unloving.  Ouch.

Then one of you said something that opened a floodgate.  Because of this I suddenly saw myself sitting in my ‘prayer chair,’ Bible or Breviary in hand.  There I am (in my mental picture), settling in to pray.  In march the distractions, as they always do.  

The thing is:  once my mind makes any attempt to 'quiet,' then every stray thought that's been lingering around snaps up that golden opportunity to hop on in and demand its share of attention.  I can count on it.

Ah ha, there it is, I thought today.  'I can count on it.'  I've begun to associate sitting in prayer with feeling beaten up, bedraggled, worn down, defeated, and ashamed of being “lukewarm.’  Ah ha!

It’s not the Lord Himself I’ve been avoiding!  It is that persistent, nagging, dragging war with distractions. 

But what to do about this problem?  Stick to it, fight it out, trudge on upward, scale that wall of distractions unaided?

I'm sure God is pleased by such efforts.  However, I think He understands when we sometimes need a little help.  A spiritual director once asked me (when I was having trouble praying as I once had) 'well... what CAN you do?'  Start with that one thing (I was told), and begin to build on that. 

Today I went back to that suggestion.  I gave myself permission not to beat myself up, permission not to climb a ladderless wall with my bare, worn down hands.  I took one thing I CAN do and asked God to help me build on that.

The one thing (today) was music.  I remembered that I haven't been using it in my prayer time lately.  It has often helped me 'shake the dust of the world' out of my soul before, so I tried to find a CD.  Couldn't.  I'd moved them around.  

Then I got distracted by my laptop sitting next to me.. but instead of fighting that, I actually picked UP the laptop and clicked on a few holy songs (I knew just where to quickly find them).  Before long, I was absorbed in the music and singing along. 

There were pictures also, as these were YouTubes, so suddenly two senses were engaged.  One photo was of an incenser; I got distracted by thinking of how much I love incense.  No problem, I have a jar of it right next to my chair.  I opened it and the aroma gently filled my prayer space.  Three senses engaged.

I picked up a rosary (four senses), began to pray it, but before doing so I told God what and whom I wanted to pray for.  Soon I was thanking Him for one thing, and another... and, well.... what do you know!  I was talking with God, totally undistracted, unconcerned about anything other than Him and Him alone.  It was as if the whole entire world had disappeared. 

Well.  What do you know.   

'Come, O God of my heart,' wrote St. Gertrude, 'gather together my scattered mental powers and fix them upon Yourself.'

Thanks be to God.  He did.

Text not in quotes © 2013 Nancy Shuman.  All Rights Reserved.
thecloisteredheart.org    


This is part of a 'mini-series' of posts on walls. To continue in chronological order, click here.

An Open Door

This morning I received the following in an e-mail from one of our friends.  I found it so confirming of my own "in or out?" thoughts that I asked her permission to share it here:

"I had just finished the Office and Morning prayer when I decided to visit your website this morning.  There before me was the question: ' are you in or are you out?'  Words that struck a chord within.....

"You see, six years ago I went on a silent retreat, and as I sat on a mound of grass on the retreat house grounds I spotted a "door."  Jesus seemed to be beckoning me to look into that door. 

"Then, it was verse 7 of Revelation 3 that I prayed with.  But I realize now that Jesus has set forth a clear and concrete invitation today to me thru your web posting.  You weren't needlessly banging or clacking at keys, as I am 'not' doing now.  It is the Spirit and He is beckoning to all of us right now.......

"'Behold I have set before you an open door, which no one is able to shut!' 

"Oh praise God for these Words.  His Word.  And your simple invitation to us this morning, one that Jesus beckons us with......

"The door is open and nobody is able to shut it on us.  Oh let us enter into that door today, loudly singing His praises with Thanksgiving and Joy in this Season of His Birth.  For that Door leads to His Heart - a place that He calls all of us to now - where Love can be found, and we can be strengthened by it.  To bring it to this world in this year of 2013!

"The Spirit is ALIVE AND WORKING!!!!" - Anita

"And to the angel of the church in Philadelphia write:

'The words of the holy One, the true One, 

Who has the key of David, Who opens and no one will shut,

Who shuts and no one opens.  I know your works. 

Behold I have set before you 
an open door, 

which no one is able to shut."  

                                          - Revelation 3:7-8

one specific step

The person entering physically cloistered life does not stick her head in today and leave her arms and legs dangling outside to be cloistered at a later date.  She is either in or she’s not.  And yet we can give ourselves mostly to God and leave parts of our lives dangling outside that surrender.  At least, that’s how it is for me.

Making the decision to embrace the will of God is not a once-for-all-time-thing, of course.  We re-decide, circumstance by circumstance.  But there is something about at least making a decision.  One specific step.  I have found that grace comes with making this decision.  I tell God I want to live according to His will… and then in circumstance after circumstance, I find that His grace abounds.

Sometimes I imagine myself standing before an enclosure door.  I consider.  I vacillate.  I feel afraid.  I want a print-out of all that will be asked of me before I give my “yes.”  I’m trembling, second-guessing, halting, looking back, shuffling, straining.  Then, timidly, I stick one toe forward…

…and it’s as if He suddenly, tenderly, picks me up and carries the rest of me inside.  Even those flailing arms and legs. 

“Jesus, I give You my whole heart and my whole will.  They once rebelled against You, but now I dedicate them completely to you…Receive me, and make me faithful until death.”  (St. Alphonsus Liguori). 

“I am the Gate. Whoever enters through Me WILL BE SAFE.” (Jesus, quoted in John 10:9) 

Text © 2011 Nancy Shuman.  All Rights Reserved.
thecloisteredheart.org