Thursday, February 26, 2015

Doors I Cannot Open

The ideas haven't been half bad. I've imagined a hallway lined with doors, and each door leads to a room that opens into other hallways, and every hallway leads to more doors, and these are some of the chambers we find ourselves in as we journey toward living more fully for God.

I've given a few of the rooms' "working titles," all subject to change. There is the cushy room and the cluttered room and the Chamber of Secrets. There's Pinch 'Em Tight Hall and The Room of Windows and The Clue in the Attic (it may or may not be an asset that I grew up reading Nancy Drew).

Writing about these, I thought, could be a Lenten project. I've been collecting (for each room) scriptures, and quotes from saints, and experiences from my own life.

And then I started to write. Which led not to doors or rooms, but right smack dab into a wall.

I'm still at the wall, actually. It's not quite as bad now that I'm telling you about it, now that I'm bringing it out into the open and saying GOSH I'm having a struggle writing this. And I'm not sure why.

Is it that I have "writer's block?" Well, I do appear to have a case of it, but I don't know that this is the root of my inability to get words to paper screen. I think it's more likely that the block is a symptom of something more basic.

What could be the something-more-basic? Is it not having enough time to devote to this "project?" No, I've had plenty of time since Lent began.

But of course, devoting myself to this project is not my goal. My devotion should be to God, and God alone.

Maybe with that thought, I'm getting closer to the difficulty.

Is the struggle because I'm not taking enough time for prayer? Ah ha. That certainly must come first, every time and all the time, or I'm just spinning my spiritual wheels. If prayer is not the foundation, then I cannot "hear" from God, and I'm trying to open doors through my own power.

And with that thought, I am getting closer still.

So I will leave you for this time around, and go pray. I'll publish this post and immediately take an extra bit of prayer time. Yes, right now, I promise.

And next time we meet here, I'll let you know if I've seen GOD opening a door....



 
 




Photo on this post from Pixabay

4 comments:

  1. Looking forward to it! May the Spirit continue to fill you abundantly!

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  2. I love your project of the hallways and doors and the differing rooms with their treasures. Wonderful. And to be in prayer with the process is everything isn't it? Something that may be helpful I read once, I think it was Anne Lamott who wrote about a "two inch frame" to focus on while writing through a project or posts in our case. A "two inch frame" at a time makes it more manageable and helps to free up the block possibly. Praying for your praying and the opening of doors.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you. I have a new post ready to go, but there is a problem publishing it (a closed door?. Will I even be able to post this comment?! I'll give it a try..... here goes! (and if this goes through and anyone sees it, now you know where there has been no new post here in a few days!!!)

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