Cleaned By Love

Standing at the edge of Lent, I find myself reflecting upon the Sacrament of Reconciliation. And I think of this from Charles de Foucauld: 

“When you want to write on a blackboard, you must first wipe off what is written there.’

Several things occur to me as I read this.  First of all:  chalk is not permanent.  Nor are my sins.  Once the “board” has been erased, the original mistakes can no longer be read. 

Second:  a blackboard cannot be erased unless something is done.  Someone has to actually take action and clean the board.

Third:  a chalkboard eraser is not a steel wool pad.  It is soft.  It’s made to clean the board, not harm it.  If a blackboard could feel, I doubt it would cry “ouch.”

“God,” wrote St. Gregory the Great, “scourges our faults with strokes of love, to cleanse us from our iniquities.” 

Strokes of love.  Not lashes and paddles, but strokes of love.

Jesus wants to erase every one of my sins.  He knows I cannot do it on my own.  He has given the Sacrament of Reconciliation as a (gentle, loving, healing) Eraser.  I pray, as this Lenten season begins, for the grace to “confess my sins, do penance, and amend my life."  

May Our Lord write what HE wants on my life. May He make it totally His own. 

This is a slightly edited repost. It is linked to Reconciled to You and Theology is a Verb for 'It's Worth Revisiting Wednesday.'
 

A Way Through That Wall

Picture Attribution

I never want to be separated from the love of God. So I'm thankful to have the following as a vital piece of my grillwork:  "I am certain that neither death nor life, neither angels nor principalities, neither the present nor the future, nor powers, neither height nor depth nor any other creature, will be able to separate us from the love of God that comes to us in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38-39)

I read these words a second time, and a third, and I let their power wash over me.  Time cannot conquer this astonishing love, death itself cannot separate me from it. No distance anywhere will ever be too far.

However, if I look closely at the "grille" (Scripture and the teachings of the Church), I do find one specific thing that can put a wall between me and the love of God.

"Sin sets itself against God's love for us and turns our hearts away from it. Like the first sin, it is disobedience, a revolt against God through the will to become 'like gods,' knowing and determining good and evil. Sin is thus 'love of oneself even to contempt of God.' In this proud self-exaltation, sin is diametrically opposed to the obedience of Jesus, which achieves our salvation." (Catechism of the Catholic Church n.1850)

"If we say, 'we are free of the guilt of sin,' we deceive ourselves; the truth is not to be found in us. But if we acknowledge our sins, He who is just can be trusted to forgive our sins and cleanse us from every wrong." (1 John 1:8-9)

"If I cannot perceive God because of sin," I wrote here several years ago, "maybe it works both ways. Maybe He can't see ME.  Maybe He'll forget all about me, and then He won't notice that I'm living in sin. Maybe there isn't any such thing as sin; I mean, all I have to do is turn on TV to know that today's 'social norms' do not even seem to recognize its reality. 

"I can do a lot to hide that pesky wall. Add a bright coat of paint, plant some ivy, maybe even put up a hedge so I don't see the wall at all, in time. Sin can be made to look quite attractive and normal.  Just a spray of denial and a dulling of conscience, and I'm all set. 

"Except that I'm not.  I'm not set at all.  I'm walled off from God; and in my moments of honesty, I am miserable.  If I find myself in such a spot, I don't have to stay there.  If I am in serious sin, I daresay I know it. I might have tried fooling myself, playing some 'everybody's doing it' games in my head.  But I know...."

Thank God, there is a way through that wall. "If we confess our sins, He who is just can be trusted to forgive our sins and cleanse us from every wrong."  (1 John 1:9)

Lord Jesus Christ, I confess to You that I am a sinner.  In particular, I ask forgiveness for these  transgressions___________.  I am so sorry.  If my sins have been grave, help me get to the Sacrament of Reconciliation.  Give me the strength to turn away from sin and temptation, and to avoid occasions that would lead me into sin.  Thank You for Your grace and mercy.  I ask You to break down any walls of sin that keep me from You.  Jesus, I trust in You.  Amen.

Painting: Artgate Fondazione Cariplo - Molteni Giuseppe, La confessione, courtesy of Wikimedia. Click here for link.

On the Morning of Confession

'When our Lord is with us, 
light is poured abroad
on life's path, 
light is shed around
in the house of our soul,
His own living Tabernacle.... 

'On the morning of Confession, 
show Him round the house; 
show Him what needs repair;
show Him where thieves 
break in and steal; 
be busy telling Him all, 
and beg of Him the grace 
of perfect contrition.'

(from Fervorinos From Galilee's Hills, 
compiled by a Religious, 
Pelligrini, Australia, 1936, p. 223)












Reposted from The Breadbox Letters archives

Enlighten the Dark Corners

'O Holy Spirit, Love of God, infuse Your grace! 

Plentifully descend into my heart.

Enlighten the dark corners of this neglected dwelling.

Dwell in that soul that longs to be Your temple. 

Water that barren soil, overrun with weeds and briars

and lost to fruitfulness for want of cultivating. 

Make it fruitful with Your gracious beams,

Your dew from heaven..

Come, Holy Spirit, in much mercy! 

Make me fit to receive You.' 

St. Augustine

click here to leave comments in the Parlor  

Benedito Calixto painting, cropped

As One Just Awakened

'As one just awakened, I say,
God is here,
and I have been
unaware of Him.

'I confess it with shame:
Every minute of my day
is filled with other interests.

'My eyes are dazzled
by the sight
of things and people.
I have little time,
little attention,
little love,
to give You,
the Indwelling God.

'You are present indeed, but practically speaking, You might as well be absent,
when You are not present to my consciousness because I am inattentive....

'Yet You within me are God, Who made the world, Who created me,
Who died on the Cross.  
You make the Paradise of the saints.

'Dear God, it is unbelievable that I have thus
neglected You;
failed to speak to You.
as if I wished You to leave me to myself,
as if I were bent on wasting my life away
in silly, useless, even sinful occupations....

'O God the Father,
God, the Son,
God, the Holy Ghost,
forgive me!'

By 'A Religious,' LISTENING TO THE INDWELLING PRESENCE, Pellegrini, Sydney, 1940,  pp. 55-56)

Click this line to leave comments in the Parlor  

Reconciliation

On a regular basis, those in a monastery have the Sacrament of Reconciliation made available to them.  We who live in the world, however, have to take an extra step toward receiving such a privilege.  As a general rule, we must go TO where this is being offered. 

Perhaps we can think of it as mortification in advance.  

Our Sisters in a monastery, meanwhile, have a scheduled time when a priest comes to them.  In our "monastic day," perhaps that time can be right now.

In thinking of this, I decided to re-post (with a bit of minor editing) something I wrote on this subject for the Breadbox Letters blog this past Lent...

“When you want to write on a blackboard," wrote Charles de Foucauld, "you must first wipe off what is written there.”  

Several things occur to me as I read this.  First of all:  chalk is not permanent.  Nor are my sins.  Once the “board” has been erased, the original mistakes can no longer be read. 

Second:  a blackboard cannot be erased unless something is done.  Someone has to actually take action and clean the board.

Third:  a chalkboard eraser is not a steel wool pad.  It is soft.  It’s made to clean the board, not harm it.  If a blackboard could feel, I doubt it would cry “ouch.”

“God,” wrote St. Gregory the Great, “scourges our faults with strokes of love, to cleanse us from our iniquities.” 

Strokes of love.  Not lashes, but strokes of love.

Jesus wants to erase every one of my sins.  He knows I cannot do it on my own.  He has given the Sacrament of Reconciliation as a loving, healing Eraser.  I pray for the grace to “confess my sins, do penance, and amend my life."  May Our Lord write what HE wants on my life; may He make it totally His own. 

© 2012 Nancy Shuman.  All Rights Reserved.
thecloisteredheart.org     


To continue our second monastic day, click this line

A Certain Beginning of Glory

O, the joy of coming fresh from the Sacrament of Reconciliation!  Our life washed clean, all scrubbed and shining, our resolution to "go and sin no more" firmly intact!

It is the time of year when we're invited to take a sober look into our ways of living, our motives, our sinful patterns.  We do so not merely for the sake of observation.  We look at our faults in order to bring them to the ONLY One Who can heal them.

As we do so, we're able to come to a deeper appreciation of our Savior.

If we can catch even the merest glimpse of His love for us, I think we might explode with joy.

"Joy is the gigantic secret of the Christian."  (GK Chesterton)

"Grace is nothing else but a certain beginning of glory in us."  (St. Thomas Aquinas)

For prayer and meditation: 

"If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.  The old order has passed away; now all is new!  All this has been done by God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Christ and has given us the ministry of reconciliation.  (2 Corinthians 6:17-18)

Jesus "said to the woman, 'your faith has been your salvation.  Now go in peace.'"  (Luke 7:50)

(painting The Laughing Boy by Robert Henri 1910.  In US public domain)

In the Confessional

One area of the monastery I might prefer to skip over is the Confessional.  This place is part of the physical monastery, certainly - but does it have to be part of the spiritual monastery as well?  I mean, maybe I'd rather think about a nice little “friendship area,” where I imagine myself talking things over with Jesus and I can “hear” Him telling me what a really good job I’m doing out here in the world.  After all, I’m not a big sinner.  I don’t go around robbing stores.  Perhaps I could just do away with the confessional part, replacing it with something less untidy.

The truth is, however, that the confessional IS part of the monastery.   It is part of the physical monastery, and it must be part of the “monastery” of a cloistered heart.   

To tell Our Lord that we are sorry for our sins is, in reality, coming to the Doctor for healing of our wounds. “As a doctor hates sickness and does everything he can to eliminate it and to help the sick person, so do you, my God, work in me with your grace to extinguish sin and free me from it.” (St. Augustine)

Am I aware of “sicknesses” in my soul today?  Am I carrying a burden of sin or failure in need of healing?   If so, I can be assured that Jesus knows.  And in His compassion, He waits.   

With His forgiveness, mercy, and healing held out to me, Jesus waits…..

For reflection:

“Should we fall into sin, let us at once humble ourselves sorrowfully in His presence, and then, with an act of unbounded confidence, let us throw ourselves into the ocean of His goodness, where every failing will be canceled and anxiety will be turned into love.”  (St. Paul of the Cross)

 

"Let no one doubt concerning the goodness of God; even if a person’s sins were as dark as night, God’s mercy is stronger than our misery.  One thing alone is necessary: that the sinner set ajar the door of his heart, be it ever so little, to let in a ray of God’s merciful grace, and then God will do the rest.” (St. Faustina).

“Repentance is the renewal of Baptism and a contract with God for a second life.” (St. John Climacus)

“If my conscience were burdened with all the sins it is possible to commit, I would still go and throw myself into our Lord’s arms, my heart all broken up with contrition.  I know what tenderness He has for any prodigal child of His that comes back to Him.” (St. Therese of Lisieux) 

For prayer: 

“I acknowledged my sin to You, my guilt I covered not.  I said, ‘I confess my faults to the Lord,’ and You took away the guilt of my sin.” (Psalm 32:5)

 

"I have brushed away your offenses like a cloud, your sins like a mist; return to Me, for I have redeemed you.” (Isaiah 44:22)

“As far as the east is from the west, so far has he put our transgressions from us.  As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him.  For he knows how we are formed; he remembers that we are dust.” (Psalm 103:12-14)

Text not in quotes © 2012 Nancy Shuman.  All Rights Reserved.
thecloisteredheart.org      


(painting: Sankt Janobus del Altere by Rembrandt)